by Pheme Ossa
Radio Paranoia learned late Monday that the apparently abandoned FRN - formerly the Free Radio Network - is the target of a bidding war for the desirable three-letter top level domain. As of last week insiders say the high bid was held by a syndicate formed to pool the resources of the HF Underground, Free Radio Cafe, and a consortium of shortwave pirate radio operators and fans from Lula, Georgia to Poutine, Canada. The frn.net domain has an estimated market value of $500, but in a bidding war may reach into the thousands of dollars.
However by Monday a new front runner emerged, indicating the Family Radio organization plans to obtain the domain for an unspecified high-four-figure sum. The goal, according to an anonymous source, is to relaunch the FRN as the Family Radio Network and "purge the domain of the fetid remains of the stinking hutches of hell."
The FRN has been dormant since the annual Ides of March outage, an esoteric religious ceremony observed by frn.net domain owner John Cruzan. The 2013 domain outage marks the longest recorded continuous period of hermetic worship by the domain owner, reportedly an effort to ward off the too-familiar Spring tornado curse. While the history of the annual ritual is shielded from outsiders, it appears to derive from Discordianism and features sacrifices of mystical butthurt gathered from the shed rabbit fur of Pat Murphy's annual histrionics and presented as a burnt offering to troll goddess Eris.
Pirate radio fans who actually give a single dry turd about the history and heritage of the FRN, which was relevant for a few minutes over a decade ago before Pat Murphy socked up it, are urged to support the HF Underground, Free Radio Cafe and Alfa Lima coalition in a bid to purchase the domain and give it a decent burial. Show your support with PayPal donations, ad click-throughs or, if strapped for cash, just keep doing what you've been doing - positive support for the hobby. In other words, the exact opposite of whatever the hell Commander Buttmunch did that killed the FRN.