"Only pretentious annoying hacks like Stephen King would resort to meta-epigraphs."--Guise Faux
by Grinch Faux
Official Pirate Radio Fun Thief
Official Pirate Radio Fun Thief
FCC documents received today by the Tales of Radio Paranoia publishing empire, per Freedom Of Information Act request, clearly indicate "Com...
From now on, or until we've driven the wheels off this clown car, access to Premium Content Tales of Radio Paranoia articles will be restricted to Gold Member subscribers only.
We can already hear you clamoring "Geez, Guise, how do I become a Gold Member so that I, too, may enjoy the benefits of Premium Content on pirate radio's finest penny dreadful, yellow journal and dregs-drenched scandal sheet?"
It's simple, Scarlet Pimple! In the comment section below, describe in lurid detail how you have contributed to the destruction of pirate radio! Be sure to list:
- Fun stolen.
- Sockpuppets wielded.
- Buttocks millinery worn.
- Enemies exposed.
- Dox dropped.
- Stations QRM'd.
- Nasty stations logged in violation of orders.
- Consorting with Underpants Gnomes.
- Logging to the wrong website.
- eQSLs sent via snail mail.
- Snails sent in lieu of QSLs.
- Innocents falsely implicated.
- >Implications implied without green text.
- Voyages on de Nile.
- Screeds scanned.
- Trollercoasters ridden.
- Angst, ire and U MAD? provoked.
- Blarg rants per day.
- Quotes from scripture or Eastern mystics, philosophers, serial killers or Shakespeare hilariously misapplied to blarg rants.
- Complaints sent to FCC, Industry Canada, Ofcom or RA/AT to silence rival pirate stations.
- Any other details which might qualify you as an elite pirate radio fun stealer.
- Number of times you've made scowly-face whilst reading Tales of Radio Paranoia. (You know your face will get stuck that way.)
- Preferred brand of tissue boxes worn on feet whilst engaged in above activities.
Click here to access your Gold Member Premium Content!
Premium Content
ReplyDeletelol
FOILED AGAIN! However will I destroy Pirate Radio if you kids keep playing turtle, and ducking behind paywalls?
ReplyDeleteA non-existential mouse snarked...
ReplyDelete"Premium Content
lol"
Hey, don't laugh. The "Premium Content" concept worked for 7chan. And the FRN. All you need to do is ban anyone who disagrees. Or quotes reddit. Or Tumblr. Or the internets. Or logs the wrong stations.
Wait a second. If I order one Premium Content, do I get a second one free with separate shipping and handling fees?
ReplyDeleteYes, every new Gold Member gets a smoke *and* a pancake or a cigar and a waffle. Bong and a blintz available to Nederlanders only.
ReplyDeleteI've landed on the wrong site again. Damn this rusty mouse. Hand over your gold content or I'll buckle your swash.
ReplyDeleteKeelhaul yer cathead, gaff yer fo'c'sle, frimmin frammin on the jim-jam or I'll Roger yer poop deck!
ReplyDeletethis is the best blog on the internets!!! you rule Guise Faux!!!
ReplyDeleteI ain'ts no doctor, but I sure am losin' me patience!
ReplyDeleteI WANT MY PREMUM CONTENT!!!!!1
ReplyDeleteI STOLE 9 FUNS!!!1 ALL FROM COMMANDER BUNNY! I WELDED HIS SOCKPUPETS AND WORE MILTARY BUTTOCKS!!!1 I EXPOSED MYSELF TO MY ENEMIES AND DROPED A DOX OFF AT THE POOL!!!1! I QRMED A STATON IN MY PANTS LAST NITE!! I DID ALL THAT EXCEPT FOR THE GREEN THING!!!!1N I FLASLY IMPLICATED KRACKORZ M0M!!!!1 THEN I BLARGED A RANT AND COMPLANED TO THE FCCC ABOUT IT!!!1
PLESE I CAN HAVE THE PREMUM CONTENT NOW I LIEK PRONO!!!1!1
My moles tell me that the Premium Content includes the long-lost Krackwhore in Kulpsville n00dz. If so, this alone makes the subscription completely worth it. Please find enclosed my application; I was running out of Photoshop material for memegenerator.
ReplyDelete*sob* The Dear Leader is dead! Now, how will I be able to live my life, run my station, post my logs, without his guidance! Oh, woe is me...
ReplyDeleteWait, that was Kim Jong Il, and not Pat Murphy? Never mind.
What's the difference?
ReplyDelete;-D
John Poet rhymed...
ReplyDelete"What's the difference?"
Age.
The Bunnyman is not yet 69, which is the new 27 for rock star level dictators, strongmen and tyrants.
*Saddam Hussein
*Muammar Gaddafi
*Kim Jong Il
And like any crafty warlord, the Lagomurph has many doubles and lurk-alikes to distract would-be assassins.
you know guise faux kinda looks like dave mustaine of megadeth.
ReplyDeleteLooks more like a dam troll to me.
ReplyDeleteTap, tap, tap, and now click send,
ReplyDeleteI'm going to be on shortwave again.
A hundred people will no doubt hear,
the Crystal Ship from far and near.
A hundred watts will do it right,
to beam my signal into the night.
Oh! Woe is me, the FCC,
wrote a letter and sent it to me.
Who can I blame? Oh, let me think.
That rotten bunny must be a fink.
He's mean, he's bad, he uses socks.
I'll blog away and drop some dox.
I'll get a board and spam the net!
He'll get what's coming to him, you bet.
It must be true, that's what they'll say,
because I said it on my site today.
'Cause I'm the Poet, don't you know it.
I might have blown it, and I show it.
LOL, Reach. That's pretty damned good. Inaccurate and a mite selective in omitting the hare's documented transgressions, but funny.
ReplyDeleteNot like we're sticklers for accuracy or fairness here anyway. We're Faux Snooze, making Fox News seem downright upright in contrast.
Well, the Bunny Cult has never been afraid to let the facts stand in the way of a good story.
ReplyDeleteIt's amusing, and poetic.
ReplyDeleteBut the ending is very weak.
Welcome to the revolution,
ReplyDeleteten tables stuck in a corner
upstairs in a backstreet bar
five wannabe poets
a couple of guys with guitars
a few stragglers who just kinda
stumbled in
The Revolution will begin on Tuesday.
All things being equal and if it goes well,
there's a sequel planned for next week
called 'Building Utopia'.
First we have to smash the System,
capitalize
on this wave of social unease.
'Two lattés and a sparkling water please'
sneaking outside for a smoke
with some of the other
revolutionaries
keeping an eye on the time for
the last bus
'Two coffees and a water?'
'Thanks'
Thinks.
Dammit.
The 46A will be no match for the tanks.
We'll have to mobilize the taxis -
poor fuckers won't have a chance
the slaughter will be obscene
( of the tanks, not the taxis, I mean)
We'll undermine the secret police
with twitching curtains
and a rumor machine.
We'll destroy the power of the unions
with a work ethic.
Make wealth unfashionable,
display of it pathetic.
we'll take back the churches
drive out the religious pharisees
re-dedicate them
to the spirituality
they robbed us of.
'Thank you, Rhea Charound.
Could you pay your sub
return those library books?
Next speaker to the mic, please!'
Rea Charound: are you getting poetry tips from this guy, by any chance?
ReplyDeleteCommander Murphy has said it is time to end the Pirate War. I actually think that the use of that phrase, in terms of the the CB (Got yer ears on??) is wrong.
ReplyDeleteIt should be called the Crystal Ship Pirate Radio Station versus King Sockpuppet Lying Snitch Keyboard Pounding Blog Hog war.
After all, the Bunny and his Circle of Jerks are the only ones reading the WBN-Lie Blog and eat those rabbit droppings just like they are candy.
Those with common sense know, that Commander Ego likes to talk to himself anyway. I mean, I hope that is what he used those sockpuppets for. "I wish I was fist deep in cotton!"
The Pirate War IS over!
ReplyDeleteWe won.
WBNY is off the air. The bunny can't risk broadcasting because the FCC is ready to pounce on him thanks to everyone who sent in complaints about him. That was retaliation for snitching out The Crystal Ship.
His blog is "off the air" now too, at least to the public. With the bunny blog private, no one has to see his eye pollution ever again, and no n00bs will get suckered by the "QSL Package" phishing scam.
The bunny just gives away all that free stuff to get dox on people.
No more of that!
We can celebrate a victory because we have driven the bunny out of pirate radio!
Your Mom said...
ReplyDelete"...The bunny can't risk broadcasting because the FCC is ready to pounce on him thanks to everyone who sent in complaints about him..."
Dear Mom,
You's trollin'!
The 'war' will not be over until I have finished firing back. My turn to shoot has just begun.
ReplyDeleteHow Commander Bunny and his Gang of FRN Sock-Puppets Started the Pirate Radio War of 2011
"Complaints sent to FCC, Industry Canada, Ofcom or RA/AT to silence rival pirate stations."
ReplyDeleteDon't forget the PTT! That's where bunny started ;-)
"Push-To-Talk"?
ReplyDeleteProne-To-Tattle?
ReplyDeletePTT: http://freeradiocafe.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=922
ReplyDeletePTT = Posts, Telegraphs, and Telecommunications - essentially, Holland's State-owned telecom monopoly. In some countries, the equivalent to this was also the body responsible for regulation of the RF spectrum.
ReplyDeletethe FRN is giving out Christmas presents
ReplyDeleteScript/Exploit
The Script/Exploit is not a virus, is it a heuristic scan warning, that there is a file on your computer which is able to use a security hole. It is necessary for such a program to have rights to change the Windows registry settings, and the program gets these rights by a dirty trick. This script does not contain any destructive action. If such a file is present on your computer, it is necessary to delete this file to avoid any further security damage done to your computer.
i will not darken my screen with it's EVIL presence again
The FRN is the DEVIL,s phone booth
skrewloos
why is christmas suppose to make everyone so damn happy... sure as hell doesnt me... all i see is stupidity, and a little, very little actual goodwill ..its mostly just people swapping money.. i give you 25, you give me 25.. fucking stupid. go give to someone who may need.... anyone in your country, doesnt matter to me. i have seen one person, one do just this, this year.. yup Kracker did it...the Man has heart...
ReplyDeleteHey, who's the Grinch here, you or I?
ReplyDelete"...go give to someone who may need..."
I couldn't agree more. Go find that person. And sing:
Deck us all with Boston Charlie,
Walla Walla, Wash., an' Kalamazoo!
Nora's freezin' on the trolley,
Swaller dollar cauliflower alley-garoo!
Don't we know archaic barrel
Lullaby Lilla Boy, Louisville Lou?
Trolley Molly don't love Harold,
Boola boola Pensacoola hullabaloo!
Bark us all bow-wows of folly,
Polly wolly cracker 'n' too-da-loo!
Donkey Bonny brays a carol,
Antelope Cantaloupe, 'lope with you!
God bless Pogo and Walt Kelly.
Anonymous December 25, 2011 7:34 AM
ReplyDeletei have seen one person, one do just this, this year.. yup Kracker did it...the Man has heart...
awww he so special NOT!!
there are a lot of people who give to actual needy families and elderly Anonymously we don't need someone stroking our ego trying to make us look like a nice person
WE don't have to
GUISE thats nice
Deck us all with Boston Charlie,
Walla Walla, Wash., an' Kalamazoo!
Nora's freezin' on the trolley,
Swaller dollar cauliflower alley-garoo!
Don't we know archaic barrel
Lullaby Lilla Boy, Louisville Lou?
Trolley Molly don't love Harold,
Boola boola Pensacoola hullabaloo!
Bark us all bow-wows of folly,
Polly wolly cracker 'n' too-da-loo!
Donkey Bonny brays a carol,
Antelope Cantaloupe, 'lope with you!
MERRY CHRISTMAS
anonomoose
SOCK@December 25, 2011 7:34 AM
ReplyDeletewhat he do steal a little kids presents and give them to you
Guise, where you been? At CES in Las Vegas checking out the Icom, JRC and RF Space booths? You hitting SWL Winterfest this year, I hear it's the 25th anniversary, who knows the luminaries that might show up.
ReplyDelete