Thursday, December 1, 2011

TWIRP: The Lagomurph Blinks

The mighty blargers stood virtual face to virtual face across the pitiless expanse of the interweb.

Grinch Faux, he stared with a baleful glare

a stare as bare as any may dare...


...and the Lagomurph blinked.







by Grinch Faux


The Lagomurph blinked and blinked and blinked

And off he'd slink in a terrible stink

to scribble some more of his stinkety ink.

Some stinkety ink about horrible Pinks

who dare to speak up whenever he finks.

This Week In Radio Paranoia: Mark it on your calendars, dear readers. Blarg date 29 November 2011, Commander Bunny begs for surrender in the pirate war that exists only in his imagination.

"YOU STOP – get your asshat monkey friends (Corq, aka: Guise Faux, HF Underground, Bxxxxxx Jxxxxx, Txxxx Txxxx, Kxxxx Mxxxxx & posts on FRC) to stop and then we’ll stop. How does that sound for a Peace Treaty? REMOVE ALL OFFENDING ATTACKS against Commander Bunny, Kracker and his friends…OR NO TREATY!"

"...you don’t want your full name and public address being posted on the WBNY website? Then you stop doing the same thing to other people in Pirate Radio, and have your nasty little monkey friends stop it! Corq aka: Guise(honestly its not a secret anymore), HF Underpants, FRC etc. You stop it or it I will keep it visible and public until the end of time! Think I’m fooling? Try me! Here is your chance to END IT"
--Commander Bunny, WBNY blog, "WBNY WEBSITE: 28,933 Visitors EVERY SINGLE DAY!", November 29, 2011

Yes, it's a ranty rabid rabbit sort of huffy puffy threatening sort of surrender, but the real message is clear when you read betwixt the lines lyings.

Whilst we appreciate the Lagomurph's conciliatory gesture and tacit admission of guilt in prosecuting an imaginary war, it's completely unnecessary. The war, if one exists, is totally within his paranoid imagination. Just as it has been for over a decade.

Take the cure for myxomatosis, dear fellow. Relieve yourself of the obviously heavy burden of guilt you're experiencing for having dragged so many innocent peripheral bystanders into your bizarro world orbit. No need for unseemly public atonement. Just start privately...

...with "Spore", whom you publicly slandered whilst exposing the names addresses and amateur radio call signs of an entire family, without even knowing for certain that you'd targeted the correct person in your tantrum.

...with Radio Ga-Ga, whom you needlessly baited into an argument, with your Beans and Official Press Release sockpuppets, over a minor allegation of QRM that could easily have been resolved less melodramatically - and certainly without your publicly identifying his city.

...with Doc John for attempting to entrap him and silence his station, again using a sockpuppet, followed by your hysterical spectacle of slanders and pleading tantrums on the FRN, on your blog, your Facebook account, on the Free Radio Weekly and by e-mail to dozens of people.

...finally, with the many innocent individuals whom you have targeted in your misguided rage, in particular Gayle Van Horn who did absolutely nothing to you other than to pop up as some sort of apparition in your fevered imaginings.

Don't apologize because we've suggested it. Do it for you own peace of mind.

We are not warriors. We are historians to your hysterias. All we've done here is to document what we've observed. We are but attentive scribes, jotting down the lyrics sung by a tragi-comic tenor, transcribing the notes to this humoresque as best we can whilst attempting, in our ever so 'umble way, to convey the full scope of emotion, intrigue and brilliant irony in your personal opera.

And in that pursuit of yeomanlike documentary of your adventures through free radio and the blargosphere, we shall on occasion challenge, correct and refute your more incredible calumnies, defamations and dissemblings, in the pursuit of noble truth.

Such truth will on occasion, as appropriate, make reference to your true identity. Not out of any sense of malice, but in the pursuit of accuracy. As you well know from your long career, you are, after all, a public figure - or, at the very least, a limited public figure - within the standard definitions of journalism practice in North America. Your distinguished career in licensed commercial broadcasting and various endeavors in regional politics and commentaries on regional issues ranging from politics to the media clearly qualify you for such consideration and we would be remiss in failing to note that distinction. But you already know this. We've listened to your talk radio shows. We've read your commentaries on regional issues.

And none of your thrashings over the situation with Poet and TCS will distract us from the attentions you have earned the hard harebrained way. Sputter "But-but-but, Poet! But-but-but, a$$hat$! But-but-but, ruining our fun!" all you like until your overgrown incisors need a veterinarian's attentions. Nothing in the Tales of Radio Paranoia blarg will be deleted. Because we are confident you understand free speech, parody and satire. You used to have an admirable station by the name of Radio Free Speech that employed those very same techniques in pursuit of a greater truth.

Meanwhile, virtually none of the persons you have targeted for your... attentions... shall we say, scurrilous diatribes?... would qualify as even limited public figures. The lone possible exception might be Mrs. Van Horn, but as we have attempted to assure you and Kracker repeatedly, she has had naught to do with Tales of Radio Paranoia.

By the by, dear fellow, we noticed your recent frantic revisions to the above cited WBNY blarg now include some new names. You should be aware that there is a strong possibility that one or more of those persons are free radio operators and have done absolutely nothing to merit your peculiarly expressed affections. We mention this only in the interest of helping you to avoid yet another embarrassing situation in which you have once again dropped dox and exposed others to the attentions of regulatory enforcement officers.

And, dear readers, we strongly suggest that in order to avoid such uninvited attentions from the Lagomurph, you may wish to join us in chanting... Good luck, buddy, I'm behind seven Boxxies!


News of the Now - for real
Still feeling a bit misogynistic?
International Freedom of Expression - IFEX members highlight risks faced by female journalists on International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women.

Video of the Now
Still feeling like dropping dox and exposing real names, addresses and personal information about people who've done nothing to merit your angst?
StealthBadger soberly explains "Why You Don't Drop Dox"

50 comments:

  1. Can I also be Guise Faux? Please? Please? Pleeeeeeeease? Everyone else is, and I want to be one of the cool kids too!

    Sorry, residual effect from reading the WBNY blog. Speaking of which: I do note with some degree of satisfaction that despite the lepus' prior exhortations about blogs not being of any relevance to the pirate radio world that suddenly BLOGS ARE SERIOUS BUSINESS. It's nice to know that he's capable of changing his tune once in a while.

    By the way, ComBun, you do know the difference between a page hit and a unique visitor, right? Of course you do; you're just skewing the numbers in your favour. Good job there, hopalong; hopefully nobody has noticed.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Good god 7 Boxxies ! I had a dirty dream like that the other night.

    ReplyDelete
  3. mmmmm BOXXY

    http://4cache.net/image/12155.html

    ReplyDelete
  4. Yeppers, MAI BLARGS R SERIOSE BIDNISS. Symptoms of seriose bidniss include:
    1. Terminal butthurt.
    2. Sending unsolicited QSLs to people who never heard your show.
    3. BLARG!!!

    Oh, BTW, nice going, Blogger. Flagging ordinary comments as spam but the link to fake Boxxy pr0n goes through. What is this, /b/logger?

    ReplyDelete
  5. but but but look at the boobies

    more interesting than listening to the monkey in the bunny suit or radio jamboree

    ReplyDelete
  6. Boobies are always much more interesting than radio but nonetheless, the bunny and kracker are right and you are wrong. You bet your boots, bub! Corq it!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Geez, JerryMichael/Pat/Bunny/Beans/Mosby/Thumper et al ad nauseum didn't even mention me--I feel slighted, LMFAO!!! Does that mean I can't take my turn being Guise Faux?
    And anyone notice that his/their 'Occupy Pirate Radio' post on the Freakin' Rabbit Net is no longer there?
    And, BTW, I don't hide behind 'Anonymous!'

    Alex_in_West_Virginia

    ReplyDelete
  8. perhaps next time the bunny will mention you, alex. maybe you can get to be Faux for xmas. would you like that? we'll be sure to jump on it if that is what you request.

    anonymous_not_in_west_virginia

    ReplyDelete
  9. Will CB be posting/announcing how many people and/or sock puppets have actually "subscribed" to the new "friends/sock puppets-only" WBNY website?

    ReplyDelete
  10. As I said, I don't hide behind 'Anonymous' like cowards/stooges, LMFAO!!!!!

    Alex_in_West_Virginia

    ReplyDelete
  11. And BTW, anyone notice that all the "complaints" about John Poet on the bunny blahg are from 'Anonymous' listeners. Now, they couldn't be just made up, could they? ;>P

    And I like this: "perhaps next time the bunny will mention you, alex."
    C'mon, JerryMichael/Pat/Bunny/Beans/Mosby/Thumper et al ad nauseum, why don't you just say "I" instead of "the bunny?" Typical cowardly behavior from a rightwing redneck hater--hide your real identity!! Again, LMFAO!!!

    Alex-in_West_Virginia

    ReplyDelete
  12. Will CB be posting/announcing how many people and/or sock puppets have actually "subscribed" to the new "friends/sock puppets-only" WBNY website?

    While your question is tounge-in-cheek rhetorical, I'll respond with "Would it matter if he did?".

    If there was any legitimacy in CB's position, there would be threads of support on the FRN. In the old days, any perceived "attack" instantly raised an FRN thread (usually by CB or a sockpuppet), pining for support. The veterans would roll their eyes, play along, and post a few softball responses to soothe the annointed one's ego. We're not seeing any of that now are we?

    It's also interesting to note the significant number of veteran DX'ers (those who had post counts in the high hundreds and thousands) who have left the FRN.
    If you just wanted to avoid the conflict, you could still post logs. But we're not seeing this either.

    The silence over there speaks volumes.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Yes, in fact, a lot of us have quietly left the FRN, although the idiot admins there would have you think that we were all given the boot. I imagine that Kirk is spinning in his grave over this.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Poor Kirk is spinning like that skipping asshat record album here and on the other asshat blogs. Spin, spin, spin!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Kirk Trummel Was nothing special, just another junkie who did himself in! good riddance dick head! Want some more meth! Oh wait, your dead!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Actually it was cancer, but I guess he wasn't as lucky as you were in 08.

    ReplyDelete
  17. It's nice to note that a real victim of all of this is the FRN. For all of his ranting about how the FRN is the greatest pirate site on earth, Pat has managed to marginalize it. His toadies will join the WBNY blog, and everyone else has left the FRN for HFU, FRC, and #pirateradio IRC.

    When the FRN finally fails, everyone, friend or foe, will know who was responsible. Jerry's prostate must really be swollen with pride!

    ReplyDelete
  18. give us another sob, bob. poor baby. yawn.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Anonymous spluttered...
    Kirk Trummel Was nothing special, just another junkie who did himself in! good riddance dick head! Want some more meth! Oh wait, your dead!
    December 2, 2011 5:46 PM


    You's trollin'.

    Aren't you glad this blog allows anonymous comments? It's like /b/ only not clever or funny.

    Would you be willing to say the same thing under your usual pseudonym associated with the pirate radio scene? I don't mean real name - that's not required here. But would you want that comment associated with your familiar alias 10 years from now? If so, then troll on, bro.

    Trummel may have been controversial, and by some accounts courted controversy through trolling. But in retrospect his legacy will have left a more positive impression on the hobby than Murphy's will. As talented and prolific as Murphy is in programming, his antics will forever tarnish his legacy. And unlike on the FRN, Murphy can't reinvent his history anymore with selective editing and sockpuppets.

    Fortunately some open-minded pirate fans archived Trummel's shows and arrr-ticles. Kirk's arrr-ticles on pirating, under his Nemesis nym, are still useful and, unlike Murphy's, not misleading and self aggrandizing. Murphy's tips on avoiding the FCC are laughably obsolete. He seems to think the FCC is still in 1950's mode, guys in suspenders and fedoras, smoking cigarettes while slowing spinng the dial on Collins R-390A, hoping to hear a rascally pirate. Then they'll hop on the running boards of three black cruisers while twirling diamond shaped directional antennas.

    But what can one expect from a Lagomurph who boasts an 8 watt "international relay service" during the ass end of the solar cycle.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Radio Bob pontificated...
    It's nice to note that a real victim of all of this is the FRN.
    December 2, 2011 6:52 PM


    The real victims are the many people Murphy has alienated from the shortwave pirate radio scene through his world class egomaniacal sockpuppeting, paranoid delusions and increasingly insane slanders.

    How the hell did a "community" of supposedly strongly independent minded anarchists and iconoclasts allow themselves to be duped and cowed for so many years by this fellow?

    Hell, Google Murphy's rants on Hampton Roads, VA, area politics and media blogs. Nobody there was intimidated by his tactics.

    "Local Tv Stations Missing The Dtv Boat!"


    And when enough people called him on his bullshit, he had a hissy fit, deleted his Virginia News Service blog and stomped off into the sunset to play the schoolyard bully in the pirate scene.

    No wonder so many people are pissed off at Poet and the ToRP blog. They must feel pretty stupid after pledging allegiance to a sock drawer.

    Unless they're just trollin'. In which case, troll on, bro.

    ReplyDelete
  21. I went over to the WBNY blog and read up on his new subscribers-only policy. I laughed and laughed.

    After I finished laughing I went ahead and signed up using a fake identity that Commander Bunny and Kracker already trust. We'll have a person on the inside now and I'll let you guys know what he's ranting about and pass along other insider Bunny news.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Brave yon Knight Anonymous declared...
    "...I went ahead and signed up..."
    December 3, 2011 1:07 AM


    And that was the last we ever saw of him, officer.

    ReplyDelete
  23. C'mon, we're talking about a creature that will eat its own droppings for nutrition and in turn provides rather empty nutrition for unlucky scanvengers that happen to look to them for food. It's called rabbit starvation. A worse case diet of rabbit alone will eventually end in death.
    Please, less bunny talk and more Boxxy boobs!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Guise Faux said:

    Brave yon Knight Anonymous declared...
    "...I went ahead and signed up..."


    Don't bother; we already have TWO moles inside the Bunny's circle of trust.

    I also vote for more boobs. But not at the expense of C. Bunny talk; maybe just in addition to C. Bunny talk.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Apparently, Commandumb Bunny lacks an intelligent end game plan. Poke a hornet's nest and they're not likely to surrender peacefully and laugh about it all over a beer.

    ReplyDelete
  26. http://www.mostlysafeforwork.com/blog/image.axd?picture=WindowsLiveWriter/AGuidetoMoobies/5CBF5200/small_themadguidetomanboobs.jpg

    PMLOL

    ReplyDelete
  27. Hell, if you want a PMLOL go back and read old Kracker rants on the FRN.

    I sent him the recording .. WAR I say f00kin WAR .. Lets play motherf00kers , I have already lost every thing , nothing left to loose , lets f00kin play . I am seriously dangerouse at this point , f00kin watch me...

    There's a PMLOL for you

    ReplyDelete
  28. Everyone on all sides on this stupid prate war should just STFU. As a pirate dxer I am sick and tired of hearing everybody whine like a bunch of crybabies on all these blogs and boards. Pitiful, just pitiful.

    ReplyDelete
  29. A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders.

    The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?"

    "I'll have the same," says the ostrich. A short time later the waitress returns with the order.

    "That will be $9.40 please." The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.

    The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke."

    The ostrich says, "I'll have the same."

    Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.

    This becomes routine until the two enter again. "The usual?" asks the waitress.

    "No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad," says the man.

    "Same," says the ostrich.

    Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, "That will be $32.62."

    Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.

    The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time?"

    "Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there."

    "That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would ask for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!"

    "That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there," says the man.

    The waitress asks, "What's with the ostrich?"

    The man sighs, pauses and answers, "My second wish was for a tall chick with a big butt and long legs who agrees with everything I say."

    ReplyDelete
  30. "A Nonny Mouse opined...
    Everyone on all sides on this stupid prate war should just STFU. As a pirate dxer I am sick and tired of hearing everybody whine like a bunch of crybabies on all these blogs and boards. Pitiful, just pitiful.
    December 3, 2011 4:21 PM"


    You're free to say that here, and even welcome to do so. Would you have felt equally free to say so on the WBNY blog?

    Many pirate DXers felt the same way for the past decade whenever the annual pirate war was reignited. Those who spoke their minds under their real names or familiar online aliases often became targets.

    If the policy of appeasement worked, Neville Chamberlain would be regarded as a hero, rather than as a well meaning stooge.

    This blogging stuff is just for amusement. It's not intended to please everyone. It's not even intended to change the hobby for the better or worse. If it fails to amuse, take it off your reading list. Same as spinning the VFO when the radio makes awful sounds.

    ReplyDelete
  31. @Anon "Everyone on all sides on this stupid prate war should just STFU. As a pirate dxer I am sick and tired of hearing everybody whine like a bunch of crybabies on all these blogs and boards. Pitiful, just pitiful."

    I am sick and tired of the bunny-mafia troll who keeps posting while portraying himself as 'the average pirate radio DXer' who is "sick and tired blah blah blah".
    You control your internet. If you really don't like it, then DON'T READ IT! Nobody on this side of the issue is pointing a gun to your head, and making you read it! (As for the Bunny side of the equation, I can't speak to that...:D ) For both sides to drop it all would serve only one side... The Bunny's side would obviously be well-served if we let the matter of all his abuses slide, and therefore allow a bunch of unsuspecting newbies to unknowingly give up their private info through his various methods of getting it. And, the Bunny-side would also be well-served if he shut up-- because he's such a bumbling, self-destructive idiot!
    Neither seems likely to happen.

    Meanwhile, STFU yourself!

    ReplyDelete
  32. no you STFU ppp-punk poet & corq it ya crybaby. waaaaaaaaaah!

    ReplyDelete
  33. Hypocrite said...

    Me? I'm sick and tired of all the violence and porn on my TV all the time.

    ReplyDelete
  34. ....in the Sockpuppet News Report for today....

    ...Winston tries his GoldCup skills with a KBOX log looking rather...well, inadequate as usual....

    ...later chimes in under the Grapes Of Wrath section pining about the 'good old days' when he strutted his stuff in snazzy tubed varieties and feeling a bit frustrated with his master's subpar blog efforts....

    ...our producers are discussing a relief effort fund for the weary rabbit, but haven't found any takers from the supposed pool of supporters....

    ReplyDelete
  35. Hey! I made an "enemies list".

    That's the first time I've made one of those since I dumped a girl in 8th grade.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Anonymous snarked...
    "...in the Sockpuppet News Report for today... Winston tries his GoldCup skills with a KBOX log..."


    We saw it and LOL'd appreciatively. But we're uncertain which announcer he was referring to: Orson Welles or Boxxy?

    Pigmeat enthused...
    "Hey! I made an "enemies list"."


    Welcome to the home of the famouse! We boast the fastest growing enemies list since Stalin and Nixon set the standard.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Way back when,I was Joe Stalin.

    Things do have a way coming full circle.

    ReplyDelete
  38. I like how the rabbit's gone all History Channel with his ancient aliens cowflop.

    He's "winning" the pirate war by losing his mind.

    ReplyDelete
  39. the word verification for this comment is "UNCOUTH"

    what no pirates week programs to document all this rodent bullshit shenanigans

    ReplyDelete
  40. the rabbit is winning and you are all whining and i am so pmlol-ing. hahahahahahahahaha!

    ReplyDelete
  41. ....in the Sockpuppet News Report for today....

    ...Winston is publicly admonished by an FRN admin & dxer for his whining post about the 'good old days' in the Grapevines Of Wrath and quietly slinks away removing post this morning....

    ...but only minutes later, Pat reappears here on Radio Paranoia to add another unremarkable troll post about...well, whining?!....

    ReplyDelete
  42. Just curious if the ComBun has a designated heir to keep his secret blawg alive after he's dead. Someone to keep the FUN train chugging along as if he were still with us. That would be great. Someone who can crap M&M's, vomit on cue and gain the trust of an unborn fetus.

    Frankly, I dont care what's going on inside that piss-stained cedar chip hutch, same as I don't want to know what all those cowboys are doing up on the mountains in their tents on these cold nights. Sorry, Frank.

    ReplyDelete
  43. Anonymous chortled...
    "...in the Sockpuppet News Report for today... Winston is publicly admonished... and quietly slinks away removing post this morning..."


    Always a good idea to use the quote option when replying to any online entity who's earned a reputation for the sort of trolling, flaming, ranting and whining that epitomize the Lagomurph's incarnations. That way he'd need to delete your reply as well - which he was accused of a few times over the years. He'd always blame it on FRN glitches. Awfully convenient, those glitches.

    "...but only minutes later, Pat reappears here on Radio Paranoia to add another unremarkable troll post about... well, whining?!"

    Not all of our unhappy readers are the Lagomurph and Kracker.

    Don't put too much stock into anonymous comments here. We provide that option because of the nature of the pirate radio hobby. Some of it is trolling and samefagging, some is just folks blowing off steam.

    ReplyDelete
  44. This message *not* brought to you by PMLOL, the Pre-Menstrual LOL.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Looking at his "enemies list" again he tried to give away both mine and Doc John's QTH.

    Let's try an exercise in logic;

    When a pirate gives out the supposed location of other pirates intentionally and publicly,said pirate is a snitch. That we can all agree on.

    CB published what he thought were mine and Doc John's location in his blog,which was then public.

    Pirate snitches put other pirates info out intentionally and publicly,which is what CB did on his then,open blog.

    Therefore,Commander Bunny is a snitch,as reflected by his actions. There's no other possible conclusion

    ReplyDelete
  46. Well, we knew that at least four months ago, didn't we?

    So now, he's a BIGGER Snitch!

    ReplyDelete
  47. According to the lagomurph's blewarrgh, the floppy-eared one is apparently throwing in the towel. Of course, he wasn't responsible for any of the current state of affairs. Oh, no. Not at all. Fingers (or possibly paw pads) are whirling in all directions, but he was just keeping it 'fun'. You know, for the listeners and newbies.

    WON'T SOMEONE THINK OF THE NEWBIES? Wait, it's covered. We're all good. Glad that one's cleared up.

    ComBun, you do know that this isn't over just because you've decided, somewhere in your fuzzy little head, that it is, right? You're tainted like week-old carne asada, so any thoughts of going back to your old tricks should probably be shelved tout suite.

    ReplyDelete
  48. I just crapped out some fresh chocolate M&Ms in case anybody here is hungry. Time to dig in, asshats. Hehehehehehehehehe!

    ReplyDelete
  49. Nice Bunny. I am so glad this is finally over. Too much fun. Too funny. Now how about a beer at Hooters?

    ReplyDelete

Anonymous comments are welcomed to encourage frank participation. No need for your e-mail, OpenID, or Google accounts. Use a freebie proxy if you prefer when visiting ToRP, there are many.

Comments may be deleted if they:
1. Expose personal info about people who aren't public figures or limited-purpose public figures (if you're not sure, Google those terms). Don't drop dox, kthxbai.
2. Threaten real-life violence or stalking. This is just the interbutt. Got aggro? Go play some video games.
3. Fail to amuse us. But we're easily amused.

There may be a short delay before your comment appears, especially if links are included in your comment.